The Struggle
Christ, it's been a shitty month.
Personally, professionally, and everything in between. I think the tendency for creative types is to lean towards negativism and fatalism. And, after this past month, I found myself doing the same thing. I mean, I already have a helluva tendency towards negativity anyways, but, this has been an Atlas-esque month.
A lot of it stuff I probably won't ever really talk about in public because, frankly, it's just the struggles. It never gets easier, not really. We fight because if we don't we drown. And the temptation to drown is always sitting right there promising at least a life of less stress.
I found a lot of solace the past few months in the diet and health turnaround we've been having. It has a pretty pure concept behind it. We put a ton of nasty shit into our bodies. Our bodies will eventually fail even if taken great care of, so, shoveling in toxins and fats and grease and things made in a laboratory is just going to gum up the works even more.
It's not that part of it though. It's the first part. Your body will break. You are built for a purpose, but, even within a completely 'perfect' use of said body, it sometimes will still fall short. And considering that, why wouldn't you do everything you can to prevent that? Why wouldn't you give it the best version of everything you can handle and strive towards perfection, knowing that you will undoubtedly fall short because everyone does. Nobody is perfect. Possibly my wife, but, other than her, nobody.
Your career is exactly the same. No matter how hard you work, or aggressive you are to get where you want to be, there's somethings you just can't control. I found myself coming in second on a bunch of opportunities this month. An eerie number of times, actually. In a bunch of different ways.
And it's maddening. Truly. Heart breaking, even. But then... I reframe it. I put it back into context. Last year? I didn't even place. Tons of immensely talented people around me didn't even get to show up for the race. And, I had some amazing people cheering me on.
That is the fuel. That is the thing that adds to your drive and counteracts all of the misses and failures and shortcomings.
This month was incredibly difficult. But it was also inspiring because I got to see how many people have my back and want me to succeed. Find those people in your life, cherish them, thank them, and always, always remember them.